Saturday, April 30, 2005

Damn It All To Bloody Hell!

I cannot believe I have come down with a miserable cold!?! Yesterday, I did some yard work and mowed the lawn. For the rest of the day, I could not go ten or fifteen minutes without blowing my fucking nose. Like I have time to stop every ten minutes for such shite. Needless to say after going to happy hour/after hour with members of the crew last night I woke this morning feeling like utter shit! Good thing I have plenty of Puffs tissue and chicken rice soup. Monkey balls, man...



Thursday, April 28, 2005

Season Premier

Today Monkey and I went to Cathedral Pines to kick our asses and break ourselves into the spring single track season. The weather was a bit windy but the sun was shining strong making conditions on the trails very good. After the recent thunderstorms (making up for 21 days straight without rain) we had the trails were a bit muddy, almost like riding through honey. But overall it was a pretty hype time! Feeling a bit euphoric Monkey and I decided to take a few pics... show off our trail-beaten bodies and rigs. Cool shit!

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Monkey was his Adapt Race. He runs clipless pedals. Gotta love the addition of the red tires. That jersey is kickin' too. He's so money!
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Me and my Dakar Comp. I run loose footy. God, I love the geometry of this rig. It allows me to hit some pretty sweet air at speed despite my size. Even for a freeride rig it performs well on single track. I'm so money! :)
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Wednesday, April 27, 2005

Fashion Shows

One of my favorite, crazy chickitas Blogbelle reminded me of a question we've all come to ponder a time or two. Why people wear such ridiculously revealing outfits when working out? Well I have a theory about this based on much experience and observation over the past decade.

On a personal note, I do not go to workout looking hot at all. I wear normal workout gear and basically sweat my ass off. So I am not at my most attractive. But this makes sense since the gym is not a social outlet for me. I run into people I know and I say what's up, but then we return to what the hell we were doing - lifting! However, I think for some the gym and a night club are the same thing. Both are places to meet people. So for them, whether they are dancing or working out, they want to look hot so they attract the eyes of others.

Some people who dress up for the gym do actually workout, break a sweat and are into it. But then again, it helps to already be built like a brick shithouse (especially if you are a women) to be all sweaty and scantly clad and still look awesome. I on the other hand, am not one of those people who look wonderful all sweaty. Although, I do look great because I get the veins showing and I'm all pumped up, but that is different.

I approach dancing the same way I approach working out. Being a former raver, when I go out to "dance" I hit the floor and four hours later I look like I did some aerobics or ran a marathon. I lose myself in the same way I do when I'm lifting. If I go to a club to actually meet chicks I tend not to dance too hard (basically, I tend to just move like 90% of most do who have no rhythm at all LOL), especially if its with a bird. Sweat is not that sexy unless its while in the thralls of a marathon shag session.


Monday, April 25, 2005

Software Security A Healthy Start To Improving Economy?

I stumbled upon this interesting article over at ScienceDaily regarding software code security and its impact on world economies. For some reason this doesn't seem like rocket (ahem!) science to me although this much is certain. There will always be those who will spend huge amounts of time exploiting any vulnerability in any code created. In a weird (as fuck) way you could say this stimulates the market for software security solutions. But I agree that tightening up security will do everybody good, from corporations to the consumer. Either way its gonna cost you!

Cash Rules Everything Around Me = CREAM
Get the money, dollar dollar bills, y'all!!!




Sunday, April 24, 2005

I declare!

Unless you tell it like it is, people just won't respect you! Take this little guy for instance. His parents have him off to the right start. Don't pull any punches and don't be afraid to state the obvious as there are many brain dead mofos walking the streets today.

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They could have a Strong Island ghetto fabulous version of the tee that could read:

"I'm proof that my Mom likes her ass tore up!"

Or, a west coast flavor (a la Snoop) version of the same tee:

"I'm proof that my Mom likes to get shizzie with the nizzie!"

Or, maybe this version to really make people think:

"I'm proof that my Mom likes Daddy to bust a double horizontal on her ass!"

And another thing, isn't a baby proof that the baby's father also likes to bone? I know I do and I have no children yet that I am aware of.



When the Weather Gets A Bit Warmer...

I'll have these to look forward to in town:

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Birdie bicyclists rule. Nothing like afternoon delight! Hell a road test like that would have everyone obeying traffic laws. First thing to remember, always yield to a great caboose!


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Saturday, April 23, 2005

In The Name of Self Discovery!

Thanks to THL for turning me on to this one:
Which Incredibles Character Are You?

brought to you by Quizilla

Wow, I'm Frozone baby! This didn't come to any surprise to me because I tend to relate to characters like Frozone and Spoony Luv (from the Crank Yankers)! Its always fun learning about yourself.


Wow this smiley reminds me of me, always looking at life through a lens... ttyl

Further evidence of Universal Truths...

No matter how screwed up people may be, deep down inside we normal (ahem...) folks all share commonalities with the loons. The ties that bind all people together are sometimes not easily seen. The more radical the person and his or her views are the more foggy this notion can be. Barring exceptions and extremes, most folks know what it is like to lose all stresses and worries of life after playing with a puppy. Or the feeling of triumph shared when your team or what ever it is you stand behind is victorious. Or the feeling that you could just choke the life out of that person who abuses his or her loved ones and those that truly care about the shit despite all of his/her faults.

We have laws, regulations and ideals in this world that don't always agree with one another in our society. Our society has been in flux for decades now but I know eventually certain truths will become self-evident. By simple notion that our evolution depends on it is really an understatement of the importance. Take the quote below, for instance. Would you disagree with a genuine truth simply on the grounds of what kind of person articulated it?

"The National Government will regard it as its first and foremost duty to revive in the nation the spirit of unity and cooperation. It will preserve and defend those basic principles on which our nation has been built. It regards Christianity as the foundation of our national morality, and the family as the basis for national life." -Adolph Hitler, February 1st, 1933.


I heard the thunder roll and great breakers crashing, washing my soul!

I hate it when it rains cause I am a sun person. But I don't mind thunderstorms too much. This morning I woke to some serious boomers which prompted Caesar to start barking and acting like a jive turkey. No problem, though. Since I don't have too much to do today (accepted for the usual domestic duties) I will catch up on some blogging and revisit ideas I had this week but didn't have time to write about...


Friday, April 22, 2005

Firing Up The Old Shoe Saw

What happened today? This week was probably the week from Spring Heaven and today it is a bit raw outside. My mind was on taking my rig out for an hour or two while the finishing skim of spackle set and the painter's caulk cured. But when I went out it was not the best day after all.

I don't mind riding in raw weather, but the sky looks like we might get a few April showers. Riding wet trails can be kick ass but riding in the rain can be monkey balls. Especially when freeriding. Especially cause I am like Gary Busey - I don't like helmets!

So I decided to do some cleaning to the rig and see what I might upgrade this summer. My rig is presently built more for free riding. But at five inches front and rear it is a timid freerider at that (perhaps a bit on the heavier side too). I think I might acquire a new frame this summer and basically transfer some of the more burley parts to that frame while trimming down my Jamis:

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I love when this bike is clean because I love black outs. Although, I think my next frame might either be white/blue or ball burnished, this rig has killer looks to go with its performance. Most of the components are designed for strength rather than shedding grams. At 270 lbs. pounds fully equipt, I put a beating on almost any frame (especially XC specific whips) so strength is good! But as I am gradually shedding pounds now that The Cop, Methodical and I are beating each other up at the gym again I can stand to trim down the Jamis a bit. Besides, becoming a speedster will help shed my remaining pounds a bit quicker. (Actually, I have only about twenty more pounds to go before I start to lose muscle mass; plain and simply put, fuck that! LOL)

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One of the first things to go would be the wheel set. I will keep these and use them on the new freeride frame. Lighter wheels make a real difference in the speed of any rig. Plus, wheel sets for XC are getting stronger and stronger and since the Jamis has five inches of travel, the ride will still be plenty plush enough. Next thing to transfer would be the shinburgers (pedals). These are more meant for freeride giving you loose footy for jumping and serious decents. But for XC they are simply over kill. I might slap on a pair of Crank Brothers Egg Beaters! Both the 2ti and sl have no weight restrictions so I'll be in great hands either way.

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Finally, the cockpit would need some retweaking. The seatpost, handlebar and stem could be trimmed down to save some more grams and keep the steering responsive. Also narrowing the width of the bars would make the rig able to handle tighter single track at higher speeds. Going fast is always cool!



Tuesday, April 19, 2005

Nothing Like The Fresh Smell...

...of Caesar's yard apples warming up nicely in the 80 degree sun!

Like most people in my neck of the woods, in light of the particularly brutal and depressing winter we had, have left much of the yard cleanup for springtime. Now that the snow is completely gone and the weather is warming up fast (local weather fruits are calling for near 80 degrees today and tomorrow) neighbors and myself are taking the time to reacquaint ourselves with our lawns.

As I open the windows in the house for yet another breezy, mild afternoon I am greeted by the distinct smell of lawnmower exhaust and something even more familiar. That familiar scent is the warming piles Caesar has left in his wake. I guess I will be needing to get back into the Spring/Summer/Fall habit of going out and collecting the yard apples. Not that I am complaining, mind you. One thing I don't like is when I am met with a surprise while mowing. So added to my errands and chores for today will be the job of searching (actually it reminds me of an Easter egg hunt LOL) for Caesar's land mines.

Any reason to be outside on a day like today is good reason! ;)



Monday, April 18, 2005

Adobe to acquire Macromedia. Could be a big deal...

Document and media developer Adobe is set to acquire Macromedia in a stock transaction by Fall 2005 pending approval from both companies' stock holders as well as federal regulators. Could mean some great new software on the horizon to add to the already powerful arsenal offered by both companies. Where would we be without Photoshop, Acrobat or Dreamweaver MX?

Here's the article from the Chicago Tribune:

Adobe to Buy Macromedia in $3.4B Deal

AP Technology Writer
Published April 18, 2005, 9:13 AM CDT

SAN JOSE, Calif. -- Combining two of the largest makers of software for creating and delivering digital content, Adobe Systems Inc. said Monday it will acquire Macromedia Inc. in an all-stock transaction valued at approximately $3.4 billion.

Macromedia shares rose more than 10 percent in early trading, while Adobe shares sank nearly 11 percent.

Both companies said the long-rumored acquisition was not to consolidate and cut costs but to help Adobe expand into new markets, particularly in the area of providing content to mobile phones and other handheld devices.

"This is not a consolidation play. This is all about growth," said Bruce Chizen, Adobe's chief executive. "We're doing this because we believe the combined offerings will be even more compelling to our customers given the challenges they're going to face in trying to communicate information in this very complex environment."

San Jose-based Adobe's software includes the popular Acrobat program for creating and reading documents that can be viewed on a variety of systems, including PCs and cell phones, as well as the popular Photoshop program for working with digital photographs.

Macromedia, based in San Francisco, makes the Dreamweaver Web-design program and Flash, which is used to animate and add interactivity to Web sites. The company recently announced tools for expanding its reach into mobile devices as well.

Neither company, however, would speculate Monday on actual product plans.

Under terms of the deal, approved by the companies' boards of directors, Macromedia stockholders will receive 0.69 shares of Adobe common stock for every share of their Macromedia common stock. That will result in Macromedia stockholders owning about 18 percent of the combined company when the deal closes.

Shares of Adobe lost $6.49, or 10.7 percent, to $54.17, in Monday morning trading on the Nasdaq Stock Market. Macromedia shares gained $3.48, or 10.4 percent, to $36.93.

The transaction, contingent upon the approval of both companies' stockholders, is expected to be completed by the fall. It also requires the approval of federal regulators.

The companies, up until about 2001, were bitter rivals, squabbling over the look of the interfaces used in their software. Still, financial analysts and customers have been speculating about a merger for years.

Afterward, both struggled as Internet boom ended, said Steven Elop, Macromedia's chief executive.

"We were largely focused inward, making sure we had the strategies in place for the next generation of activities," he said. "We both, in parallel, developed visions that turned out to be very complementary, and we established a track record of success that puts us in a much stronger position to look outward."

Chizen will remain as chief executive of the combined company and Adobe's Shantanu Narayenb will continue as president and chief operating officer. Elop will join Adobe as president of worldwide field operations.

The companies said they are in the midst of developing "integration plans" that will build on their similarities. They made no mention of layoffs.

Adobe employs 3,700 people in offices around the world. It reported revenues of $1.295 billion for fiscal 2003. Macromedia reported sales of $370 million in fiscal 2004.

"While we anticipate the integration team will identify opportunities for cost savings by the time the acquisition closes, the primary motivation for the two companies' joining is to continue to expand and grow our business into new markets," Chizen said.

Copyright © 2005, The Associated Press



Sunday, April 17, 2005

Freekin' Gorgeous

Just popped in real quick to have a tall glass of iced tea. I am puttering around in the yard trying to do a little belated Spring clean-up and finding myself more tempted to take my rig out for some trail thrashing! Oh well, I like hitting the trails with the crew but no one is available so I'll just continue to enjoy the warm rays and cool breeze leisurely. Spring time, baby! Making yard work enjoyable the world over...



Thursday, April 14, 2005

iPod One

Obviously, if he hasn't learned a lesson from both Paris Hilton and Fred Durst, Bush needs a refresher course on effective micro-management of staff. After a Bush aide leaked the playlist of iPod One (president Bush's personal iPod given to him by his daughters) media and music industry types have been having a field day analizing his personality based on his musical choices. Do I believe a person's musical tastes are a window to their soul? Um, like no shit! ;)

While, many people are really reaching on a few of the assumptions basically the music revealed was not earth shattering to myself. To put things another way, Bush is a white collar shit kicker (by way of a limo) from Texas and most of the music on iPod One fits this profile, especially with all of the Nashville and lack of any african-american artists. The one surprise I found was the inclusion of "My Sharona" by The Knack. I mean on one hand it is your generic 80s tune with that feel good vibe. But those familiar with the song and its theme (which makes me wonder why my Mother let my dad play the record so much back in the day) know that this is something we are not expecting our conservative leader to be rocking out to while spinning on his Trek.

What is more humorous is that fact that besides the amount of coverage the song and the group have received in recent years (thanks in part to VH-1), Bush is still probably oblivious to the subject matter of the song. Similar to Robert De Niro's character in Meet The Parents regarding "Puff the Magic Dragon" where he believed it was merely a song about a boy and his magical dragon.

Check out the CNN article here. You simply can't beat this shit with a wiffle ball bat!




Brief Note on Entertainment:

I know more than a time or two I've said that I find Bush to be one of the most entertaining president's (outside of the lovable Teddy Roosevelt, who's number one in my book) this country has ever seen! Only in America can a C-student type like GW make it all the way to the chief executive and not have that hard a time doing it and maintaining it. Being an independent and a moderate (basically this means I make up my own mind on issues without the confines of convention or tradition) I have no more dislike than high regard for Bush. I don't agree with everything he says, like any other normal person, but still his thought process is recognizable all the time. At best, being a natural devil's advocate of human nature, I tend to place more of my effort getting to know where people are coming from before I concentrate solely on what they are saying. This always proves to be essential whether or not you agree or disagree with the person. I also believe as an individual with this sort of make-up I am a minority in this country. Do others like myself exist? Most certainly! But bright individuals can be found all over if you look hard enough. The irony is that once you place many intelligent people into a group they collectively become dumb as a post. One of the reasons I have problems with most organized religions. As each of us grow older, wiser and pass on to the next generation (hopefullly) some useful wisdom we will continue to evolve at a snail's pace. Any faster, if you think about it, could be dangerous...



Tuesday, April 12, 2005

Going Down To South Park...

...gonna have myself a time!

Thanks to THL for introducing me to this awesome site. While you are there you can create your very own South Park character of yourself or anyone else you know for that matter. It's a pretty neat script, so be sure to let the author know!

I had some fun making myself South Parkable (huh?):

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This is me at a house party! It was cool they had a bucket hat (albeit not a Kangol) available cause that's my steez, yo!

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This is supposed to be me on my bike flying through town but they did not have a bicycle to put in the frame. It would be trick to photoshop a picture of my rig in there but I'm a bit lazy.

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Here I am DJing but as you see the Tech 12s and other gear are absent except for my cue phones. So you'll have to use your imagination as you find yourself out in the wilderness at night and the rapid motion of glow sticks illuminating the crisp air like lightning bugs in July. I have one hand on the high level gain and the other on the cross-fade, just about to lace Tears For Fears' "Mother's Talk" with Digweed's "Northern Lights" EP. Massive, indeed! Those were the days...



Monday, April 11, 2005

15 Minutes of fame the cheap way.

All of you who are peaking into my life on a regular basis know that I am a tech-junkie! When it comes to new technology, new gadgets, new digital anything I become engrossed rather easily. My life has many lusts and tech is one of them.

A question I wrote to the editors at Mobile Magazine a couple of months back regarding Motorola's damn sexy Moto Razr V3 cell phone has made the May 2005 issue of the magazine! So for those who want to check out a great magazine for mobile technology consumers and enthusiasts, stop by your local Barnes and Noble or Borders and pick up the May 2005 issue of Mobile Magazine. My submission is in the Q&A Section which is not available on their website yet.



A Paradigm and Body Broken...

“Nothing in life worth a damn is easy, nor is it required to feel great all the time.” –DRM

I keep telling myself this when I think about the goals I have set for myself. Whether it is career, relationship or health related there will be ups and downs. Experiencing downs will ultimately weather you for future storms and also prepare you to chart a smoother course in the future. I am currently in a down with regard to my health goals.

As it has been discussed before, I sacrificed much of my life to the care and assistance of my grandfather. Also, I dedicated much of my energies to trying to maintain a home. While one of these efforts was ultimately in vain, both did take a toll on both my body and my spirit. Time was needed to repair my spirit something I thought was impossible many months ago. But it did happen and now that my mind is clear on certain things I need to now focus on executing. The first most important thing for me to execute on is my body.

Now that I am turning thirty this year (holy shit) I want to make sure I do not follow the same path that other guys in my family have gone down, especially my dad. Besides, I want to not only live for a long time but I want my quality of live to be the best it can be during my time here. This is why I have hooked up with both The Cop and Methodical to start hitting the gym a lot harder than I have been these past few months.

Basically, when you work out by yourself, you tend to adjust quickly to the routine and not push yourself as hard as you could if you had someone providing motivational input. So the fact that both of my friends have decided to embark on this journey with me has given me new found motivation and energy I have not felt in quite a while. So we are like legs of a tripod. If one of us loses footing then we will all fall!

Of course, with two coaches pushing me past my previously self-imposed limits, I really fucked my body up last week! I not only tore both my Gastrocnemius m. (calf) muscles which left me practically immobile for a day and hobbling around for three more, but I also strained tendons in both elbows and both shoulders (no rotator cuff strain – thank God). Needless to say, without any pain killers in the house, I was extremely uncomfortable. Luckily, swelling was at a minimum and I didn’t see the need to see my doctor. Over the past fifteen years of participating in sports and lifting I have developed a high threshold of pain. But last week I was almost on the verge of tears for real.

Today, I am feeling better and I have enough control over my hands to be able to type pain free. On Friday, I thought I was home free being that nothing in my upper body hurt. But when I woke up on Saturday, that’s when the real fun began. Not only was I still hobbling, but I could hardly move my arms. This made showering and dressing very interesting. To be honest, I spent a little extra time in the shower and let the hot water penetrate a bit into my shoulders, arms and legs. It did feel good briefly, but after an hour it was back to the horror. I sure am thankful I am feeling better today because there are things I need to do in the garage and out in the yard that I need all my parts in working order for.



Friday, April 08, 2005

It's Finally Friday, Thank Heaven!

This morning I took care of a few errands early and since the weather took a turn for the good (yes, SUN is OUT when they were predicting rain) I decided to spend the rest of the day casually tinkering around house. You would be surprised how many little, teenie-weenie, projects come to mind when you allow yourself time to think about them. And one of them was to post, because I have been a slacker this week.

Well nothing too exciting happened really, but my bro Monkey did head off the Washington to visit Hermo and Leslie. Before he left he wanted to see if he could get a transport case for his mountain bike so he could take it with him to Washington. So of course, in tried and true Monkey tradition, homeboy called me the day he was supposed to leave and wanted to know if I would to tag along for the ride to Kreb Cycle to see if they had a case. Not a problem on such a gorgeous day ;) ! Sure as shit they did and it was a loaner, so Monkey didn't have to pay for it! Sweet.

Other than that it was pretty much business as usual this week. Domestic duties and finishing up the upstairs molding getting ready for the painting (which is my favorite part, sanding sucks the bollocks)!

So here I am in between loads of laundry typing away and reading my favorite blogs. You know I've found so many goodies I might just have to post again...


Robot 6

Monday, April 04, 2005

If Only This Were True...

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Then things would be a lot easier on my real heart!

Today was a day of phone calls, little errands and something important to do. First, I woke up on the coach again this morning after falling asleep watching a movie I cannot remember the name of. I hate sleeping on the coach but find myself doing it every now and then because I basically do not listen to my own body when it says GO TO BED! Plus, the TV is kind of like having others in the house with me even though I am alone. Sounds weird but sometimes being by myself is a blessing and a curse. Anyway, I wake up all contorted and my back in a twist. In other words, a real pain in the ass! So that's how my day started.

Number one on my To Do list was to go to Calverton National Cemetery to visit Pop's grave. Today was Pop's birthday and I thought it would be a good idea to go up and see how his plot looked and to pay respects. Last time I was there, during Christmas to place a wreath down, the area looked like a war zone. Real muddy and lots of open graves. Today it was a bit better esthetically speaking. Not too much in the way of lawn but the ground was not nearly as muddy. They had begun leveling off the area around Pop's section with a shallow layer of sand in preparation for some seeding. One thing I would like to do (preferably this fall if I am able to) is to plant some crocus bulbs randomly around his headstone. This way in the early spring (right around his birthday) he will have a little burst of color. The Crocus will spread slowly and remain low to the ground so that they won't cause too much of a hassle for the grounds personnel. I felt better after going to his grave and making sure things were alright.

Next, when I got back home I needed to call the Ford Dealership in my area to schedule an appointment so that I could get two recalls taken care of. Something about a rear bolt for the power seats and a speed control cable. Best to take care of this stuff in due time this way I won't depart the earth early. The one bitch is that the Ford dealership won't provide me with a loner car even though they said they will have the car for a few hours. At least I could have made a stop to a few places I have to go in the same town. Alas, I will be stuck at the dealership for the duration. Hopefully, they have an outlet in the waiting area I can plug my laptop into so that I am not totally out of my mind.

***Woe, stop the press! I wonder if I can have the recalls handled at any Ford dealership, not just the one where the truck was bought??? I'll have to call tomorrow to find out so that I can go to Patchogue Ford which is right around the corner from my house. If I'm going to be without a car for a few hours I might as well be home! Shit, I'm slipping a bit. LOL***

The Cop was off today and after he finished doing some shopping for a new bedroom set he stopped by the house so we could both go to Ultimate Fitness to sign his ass up. This was the third and final item on my To Do list. We both want to start working out together once again after not being able to since he joined the force (my lord, he is in his seventh year already). Time flies way too fast! Since he moved back to Patchogue where we grew up it will be convenient for us to work out after he gets home during the evening. He does a split routine where he does cardio in the morning and weight lifting at night. So this works well for me as I was at one time doing the same split routine. I'm pretty buzzed about getting started tomorrow night, especially since my Volley ball league has had the past two weeks off due to the holidays. I'm not happy unless I am participating in some sort of sport!

One thing I didn't expect was to receive a call from Melissa while on our way to Ultimate Fitness. Its hard talking to someone who is clearly not concerned with your feelings, especially since some of them still linger. In retrospect, as I think back to how she changed, the type of person she is now, the type of people who she has associated herself with and the choices she has made, I find it harder and harder to feel sorry for her. I mean I went through enough shit feeling sorry for myself while she was in Hawaii for a month with Douche Bag and I should never have done that to myself. I thank God I had the support of my friends to help me see through the shit storm she created after she left. Besides, it's safe to say she doesn't want me (of all people) to feel sorry for her except if it suits her. I guess its just the way I am built. Usually guys have the stonier hearts and girls have more compassionate hearts, but it's the other way around for me. Sometimes it angers me when I realize that even though Melissa will be a source of emotional burden to greater and (hopefully) lesser extents as time goes on, I truly wish she would stop being a financial burden. Like I've always said, things have been complicated, especially in light of the choices she has made since leaving New York. I just hope eventually she will realize this and do the right thing for me instead of for practically everyone else she comes across.

Hopefully, the rest of the week will not be so melancholy...



Friday, April 01, 2005

April Fooled By My Truck...

Today when I woke I was in a lackluster sort of mood knowing that I would have to bring my truck in to get the brakes looked at. I called and made an appointment after the other day I noticed, as I was backing out of the driveway, that there seemed to be some rubbing or grabbing happening on the front brakes. At least that's where I thought the sound was coming from. Being that my truck has nearly 30K miles on it I thought that definitely the brakes were due to be changed, at least in the front. With my luck, however, it might be something totally major like the router has to be replaced or something else unforeseen. (Poor choice of words since I foreseen this type of thing happening.)

So I arrive at my local mechanic and sit and wait to hear what the diagnosis is. I watch as the dudes roll my baby up on the lift and up it goes. I decide to read Aprils National Geographic so I don't dwell on the time passing. After a short while having made it halfway through an enjoyable article on north Pacific Orcas, one of the dudes comes in with a bill slip already in his hand. Startled, I wondered how they had changed the brakes so fast, and then wondered what the damage would be.

Turns out the dude started laughing when he noticed the look on my face. My truck did not need brakes at all. The rear discs were like at 90% (which the dude said was rare for 30K miles) and the front discs still had half their pads. Scratching my head, I asked him what could have made that rubbing/grabbing sound. He said he did notice that on wet days the brakes on the truck grab a bit after you first start it up, but that could be taken care of with different pads once I do need a change. He assured me that I was okay and that I must not be an aggressive driver since he has never seen rear discs so fresh after 30K miles. I do tend to drive a bit aggressively since I am on LI after all, but I guess I am not one of those drivers that stomps on the gas and then stomps on the brake and calls that driving.

So to top it off, the dude didn't even charge me for putting the truck on the lift and checking the brakes out. (Good deal, I thought.) So I threw the dude a 10 spot and said he could get lunch on me today! Funny shit. I have never been April Fooled by an inanimate object before...