Thursday, December 01, 2005

Yet another reason why it's all whooey!

A friend passed along to me another online quiz thingy knowing that I am an addict and claiming that the test results were surprisingly accurate. Now I thought for a moment after reading her results and realized, indeed the results were pretty spot on. So what the hell, right?

The test was through this dating site called OKCupid!. Basically, I think all dating sites are, to varying degrees, full of shit. But I figured I would take the quiz for the hell of it and for the laughs. Be warned, however, the quiz has nearly 40 questions so you will need a moment or two to read and fill out the questions. So here are the results I received:

The Boy Next Door
Random Gentle Love Dreamer (RGLDm)

Kind, yearning, playful, you are The Boy Next Door. You're looking for real Love, a lot like girls do. It might not be manly, but it's sweet.

We think the next three years will be very exciting and fruitful ones for you. Your spontaneous, creative side makes you a charming date, and we think you have a horny side just waiting to shine. Or glisten, rather. You enter new relationships unusually hopeful, and the first moments are especially glorious. If you've had some things not work out before, so what.

Your exact opposite:
The 5-Night Stand

Deliberate Brutal Sex Master
On paper, most girls would name the Boy Next Door as their ideal mate. In the real world, however, you're often passed over for more dangerous or masculine men. You're the typical "nice guy:" without just a touch of cockiness, you're doomed with girls. A shoulder to cry on? Okay, sure. But never a penis to hold.

More than any other type, Boys Next Door evolve as they get older. As we said, many find true love, but some fail miserably in the search. These tarnished few grow up to be The Men Next Door, who are creepy as hell, offering backrubs to kids and what not.


CONSIDER: The Maid of Honor, The Peach

Link: The 32-Type Dating Test by OkCupid - Free Online Dating.

I think what makes this more hilarious is that some things the test nailed, honestly. Others were ass-backwards, seriously. Do I prefer habitual, gratifying sex with the same person over a bunch of random, ungratifying sex? Sure! Do I have an inner horny side that's waiting to come out and "glisten?" I'd say anyone who knows me, espcially the birds, knows I'm a total freak in the sack. This is just a well known fact along with my shoe size! Have I been passed over before by more dangerous or more MASCULINE men? WTF? When I stand next to guys I tend to make them look less masculine which might make ME appear more dangerous.

In all fairness, I think this test would have fit me better had it been me at 16 years of age. But at 30, this really misses the mark. Oh well, at least I did get a good laugh! ;)