Tuesday, December 06, 2005

Holiday Gift Ideas and Spreading Cheer

The new accessory for this holiday season? Looks like a winner. Not only can you have ice on the sidewalk, steps, gutters and gold digger's fingers but also right inside your grill too. I believe some models come autographed by Paul Wall. Eat your heart out you crazy cracker...

Personally, I like my grill enameled and white but I'm just too fucking lame I guess. But others like their grills either gas or charcoal, so maybe I'm not that lame or strange, huh? After all, I'm mighty tighty whitey and I'm smugglin' plums! j/k

Speaking of the Holiday Season, where can I find a chick with THIS much Holiday spirit, eh?

Now this is a shining example of how to spread peace on earth and goodwill to men and women for that matter. Nothing like adding a little "jingle" to your strut to help get through the merry doldrums, I say. Think of all the smiles one can put on the faces of boys and girls you meet everyday. Plus, those who celebrate Hanukkah won't feel left out because dreidels can just as easily be incorporated into this very chic holiday look for the office and workplace.

Honestly guys, tell me you wouldn't feel a whole lot better about paying that expensive holiday postage and handling if the chick behind the counter had a pair of these poking through her uniform to greet you? For one thing, I think these should be standard holiday uniform for all bank tellers. Trips to the bank would be way more enjoyable afterall!

Most of my holiday shopping is complete. Fucking-A, buddy. And without stepping into the mall. *Yes* But there are always a few last minute extras that spring up that you know are just "perfect" for that certain friend or loved one. I think I found the perfect shirt for a buddy of mine. Check out the design here and order one for that special simian you know at Rinawear.com.

Just a side note, if you like watching videos of really dumb animals check this out:

Don't steal my bone, bitch!

So for all those trying to get their last items checked off that Christmas list I wish you luck. The weather we have been having here in the heartland has been sheer bollocks! Today I was picking up some items I had on hold at Homer's Music and Video and we got a snow/ice storm that kicked up within minutes with near ZERO visibility. Hell if I was gonna go out a try to navigate the roads back to my crib. So I bounced next door and got myself a tall English breakfast tea and chilled for nearly two hours until the storm subsided. If I were anywhere else, that time hanging around would have been "B"-to the-"O"-to the-"R"-to the-"I"-"N"-"G" boooooooooring. However, I was at a music store. So I was more than occupied. ;)

(going out on a limb)
Enduring Fans: "Eh-yo, Paul! Where the Christmas Party at dis year, yo???"
(/going out on a limb)
Paul Wall: "Right here in my mouth, bitches!!!"